how few there are who die so hard

last night, while talking to a friend who is both incredibly challenged and built-up by the life of dr. adoniram judson, i found myself interested in who this man was. i'd heard the peculiar name of adoniram judson many times in many different sermons, but i'd never intentionally taken the time to find out who this man was beyond a baptist missionary. i sat for forty-five minutes, glued to my computer, as i learned about this man's life and ministry in burma. what i discovered through trusty google was a sermon written by john piper. the sermon topic: suffering. to teach this biblical principle, piper referred to the life of dr. judson. one word: incredible. i'm going to do no justice whatsoever to his story, so do yourself a favor and read the story here: http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/biographies/how-few-there-are-who-die-so-hard.

reading about judson's life - including but certainly not limited to: two dead wives, six dead children, disease upon disease upon disease, imprisonment, torture and poverty - led me to think about suffering. real, true suffering. i think mostly because i've been thinking about my sweet friend anna this week. last saturday, anna's precious 11-month-old nephew, patterson grey, lost his battle with a congenital heart defect. the suffering that patterson's family is enduring is beyond my comprehension. the suffering they have endured for the past 11+ months is beyond my comprehension. by god's great and amazing grace, however, they have pressed on through this suffering with patience and endurance and faithfulness claiming christ as the victor and clinging to the promise that he is good. what a testimony to a world who sees death as defeat.

during my quiet time today i decided to do a little research on suffering. i'd always heard that suffering was a guarantee for anyone walking in christ. i knew that. i believed it. i've endured my share of suffering. i'm not sure if i believed it because it's what i'd always been taught or because i really believed it was biblical. tonight i read this passage from 1 peter 2 (verses 20-24):

"but when you do good and suffer, if you take it patiently, this is commendable before god. for to this you were called, because christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow in his steps: 'who committed no sin, nor was deceit found in his mouth.' who, when he was reviled, did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but committed himself to him who judges righteously; who himself bore our sins in his own body on the tree, that we having died to sin, might live for righteousness - by whose stripes you were healed."

in christ, i'm called to "follow in his steps." all of his steps. he lived righteously. so must i live righteously. he walked in humility. so must i walk in humility. he was obedient. so must i be obedient. he suffered rejection, persecution and ultimately death. so must i suffer - even suffer the death of myself. if my goal is christ and his life and death and resurrection, then suffering is a sure thing. he was called to it when he was called to the cross. i'm called to it when i'm called to be like christ. when i endure suffering patiently - with hope and endurance and faithfulness - that is pleasing to god. i so want my life to be pleasing to my heavenly father.

after reading the words in 1 peter jesus immediately tuned my heart to acts 7 and stephen. this is one of my favorite passages in scripture. stephen proclaimed the gospel boldly and passionately to the jewish religious teachers, and they stoned him. they killed him. and while they were stoning him - relentlessly beating him with heavy boulders and sharp rocks, tearing his clothes, screaming obscenities, denouncing his christ - stephen continued to proclaim the gospel. verse 59 says, "and they stoned stephen as he was calling on god." he endured patiently, waiting for god to deliver him - either physically on earth or spiritually through death.

throughout the book of acts, we're told over and over that the church was persecuted. christians were being dragged from their homes and thrown in prison - many even killed. however, we're also told over and over that "there was great joy." the early church's joy wasn't found in circumstances. despite the very real threat of imprisonment, torture, and death, their joy rested on the truth that god is god, and he is good.

being willing to suffer and then taking that suffering with joy and patience must come from a heart centered in and resting on the truth that god is exactly who he says he is in scripture. god alone is god. god alone is good. and god alone is worthy. if those things are not true there is no joy and no purpose in suffering. if those things are true - and i submit to you, dear friends, that they are - there is nothing but joy and eternal purpose.

i'm praying that god would search and know my heart, and reveal any areas where i don't trust him enough to be willing to suffer for his glory.