psalm 78

i think i've already told you this, but i try to read a psalm every day. just kind of keeps my mind focused on praise and not on whining. not that it works all the time, as you can probably attest to if you know me, but i'm trying. i read psalm 78 last night, and it was such perfect timing. i'm getting ready to start a bible study called "a woman's heart: god's dwelling place." it's a study taught from my favorite story in the bible: the deliverance of the children of israel and their time in the desert and eventual arrival to the promised land. i love that story and all of the many and wonderful characteristics of god that i learn about when i read it. it's such a powerful portrayal of god's redeeming power and patience. so i flipped open to psalm 78 (still WAY behind - i should be almost done with psalms), and here is a little of what i read:

They forgot what he had done, the wonders he had shown them.
He did miracles in the sight of their fathers in the land of Egypt, in the region of Zoan.
He divided the sea and led them through; he made the water stand firm like a wall.
He guided them with the cloud by day and with light from the fire all night.
He split the rocks in the desert and gave them water as abundant as the seas;
He brought streams out of a rocky crag and made water flow down like rivers.
But they continued to sin against him, rebelling in the desert against the Most High.
They willfully put God to the test by demanding the food they craved.
They spoke against God, saying, "Can God spread a table in the desert?
When he struck the rock, water gushed out, and streams flowed abundantly.
But can he also give us food? Can he supply meat for his people?"
When the LORD heard them, he was very angry; his fire broke out against Jacob, and his wrath rose against Israel, for they did not believe in God or trust in his deliverance.
(v. 11-22)

Yet he was merciful; he forgave their iniquities and did not destroy them.
Time after time he restrained his anger and did not stir up his full wrath.
He remembered that they were but flesh, a passing breeze that does not return.
(v. 38-39)

how patient the lord has to be with me. time after time i run to everything else but him. i think about the times that i get really angry. that doesn't happen a lot - hardly ever, actually - but when i get truly angry, i can't hold it in. i unleash it on whoever happens to be near me. and it's unfortunate, because it's not pretty. god was legitamately angry. righteously angry. and he "restrained his anger and did not stir up his full wrath." not only is that insight into just how much god loves me, but it's also an example for me in how to handle my own anger. then, of course, is the reminder that even in my humanity, god loves me. he shows me compassion because i'm human - he doesn't give up on me because i'm sinful. the almighty, all powerful god of the universe restrains his anger against me, because he is mindful of my condition. oh, how marvelous; oh, how wonderful, is my savior's love for me!

this takes me straight back to what i wrote about yesterday. how can i judge somebody else - make fun of somebody else - think i'm better than ANYbody else - when our condition is the same? what am i thinking?! human is human.

there's so much more i could write about from this passage. how god can make anything out of nothing. how he always, always provides. how he is good and faithful. how everyday i CHOOSE to be disobedient and run the other direction. oh man. i don't know why he loves me, or even HOW he loves me. but i'm glad he does.